arachnoquake movie review

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Copyright © 2004-2020 TarsTarkas.NET. The cast gets ARACHNOQUAKED to thin the numbers! Sounds like the City of Love is in deep sh*t, huh? Forgot your password? I will say it is cool to see Neelix blowing away giant spiders with a shotgun. Paul is appointed leader of the group since he was the tour-guide & takes it upon himself to save his customers but he also wants to warn his father & sister Petra (Olivia Hardt), Paul hopes this will impress his father.

But enough prologue, we have our two families that we will follow as their lives get ARACHNOQUAKED!! After running from spiders for an hour they go back to the boat and leave. They are bright pink and smooth as a baby's bottom. I don't mind if a character is clichéd, as long as they are well-written. It does, there is a big boom, and all the spiders die. Sidney Poitier’s 7 Most Memorable Performances, All Harry Potter Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer.

Search. Everyone is too focused on watching the Queen Spider set up a nest between parts of a big office building. You can say there is plenty of action.

Arachnoquake (Review) Arachnoquake. mystery and thriller, February 28, 2019 But before they get there, Katelynn has an asthma attack and dies. Images and clips used for review purposes and are copyright © their respective owners. When I want giant creature features, you almost always know just how to rub me the right way. Roy ships Paul off on driving a bus tour around New Orleans. Writer: Eric Forsberg, Paul A. Birkett. A spider attack!! REVIEW: Written by: Paul A. Birkett & Eric Forsberg Directed by: G.E. Read honest and unbiased product reviews from our users. - and Arachnoquake, whilst hardly in the same league, has a few worthwhile gross-out thrills and a nice sense of self-awareness with its tongue planted very firmly in its cheek. Why am I so happy though? There's very little to recommend this film; any comedy present is lacklustre, while the predictability is too pronounced. Of course, it doesn’t work, and the new plan is for Paul to trick the Queen Spider into eating him, so the explosives he has will ignite the gas bladder of the spider.

Anyway, I’d also like to thank the filmmakers for their tribute scene and most hilarious nod to Samuel L. Jackson in DEEP BLUE SEA…that did NOT go unnoticed, and I totally loved it AND laughed my ass off over several replays of the scene. City officials must be on vacation, because these holes are unattended. The acting is atrocious by all and Edward Furlong was probably the worst, the storyline is nonexistent, and the spiders look like they were designed and created by a 6 year old. The twist is, the earthquakes exposing the spider den were caused by fracking, the controversial process of injecting pressurized liquid into shale beds in order to extract hydrocarbons (aka oil), which has been blamed for everything from earthquakes to contaminating groundwater and making it flammable.

Giant albino spiders break free from the depths of Earth in New Orleans, making everyone’s worst nightmare a reality.

A tectonic shift in New Orleans causes large white spiders to emerge and terrorize everyone. The idea is of course preposterous and thus hilarious. And I hope we’re all back soon for Hurricyclops vs. Cheeteor! Arachnoquake is too hilarious and good-natured to be offensive and, for Sy Fy, it’s a quantum leap in quality from last year’s dire Camel Spiders and is cautiously recommended for lovers of unpretentious throwaway big insect movies. Despite their best efforts, spiders swarm out of the earthquake-opened fissures and … When I arrived home and it was on and then I saw Edward Furlong so I thought I'd give it a chance.

2012 Written by Paul A. Birkett and Eric Forsberg Directed by Griff Furst Prepare to get ARACHNOQUAKED!!! Paul follows once he realizes his sister Petra has also been kidnapped! All in all, very poor, cheap, intelligence-insulting and badly written and acted. Directed by: G.E. Arachnoquake. Now don’t go thinking that just because I didn’t go all fanboy gushing over this flick like I did with MEGA PIRANHA or SHARKTOPUS that I didn’t thoroughly enjoy myself, because I did.

Arachnoquake (Review) Arachnoquake 2012 Written by Paul A. Birkett and Eric Forsberg Directed by Griff Furst Prepare to get ARACHNOQUAKED!!! Because they can, and chase after the group as they escape on the recently recovered family boat.

And it was a little weird to have a brother/sister relationship that might have been more interesting as a romantic relationship. World revord for worst movie ever, if indeed it is a movie.

I used to watch movies like this all the time just for the hell of it (though once in a rare while, there's a gem in all the rubble). Really. Flipped the stations, came across this title and decided to cheaply entertain myself. Rated 8/10 (codger, thank you ma’am, a real robot!, cool old man, less cool store clerk, star player, star player daddy, the Queen trapped in a cave), 1 comment - What do you think? | By opting to have your ticket verified for this movie, you are allowing us to check the email address associated with your Rotten Tomatoes account against an email address associated with a Fandango ticket purchase for the same movie. In all fairness though, they are not helped by the characters they play. Giant spider movies are always fun - who hasn’t enjoyed a quick shriek at the likes of Tarantula, Kingdom of the Spiders and even Eight-Legged Freaks? Very soon, the city of New Orleans is crawling with spiders. Metacritic Reviews. Find helpful customer reviews and review ratings for Arachnoquake [DVD] at Amazon.com. Critic Reviews for Arachnoquake All Critics (1) | Rotten (1) There's very little to recommend this film; any comedy present is lacklustre, while the predictability is too pronounced. Posted on May 7, 2014 by thebmoviereview. It's a what-you-see-is-what-you-get kind of movie, in which various characters are menaced by prehistoric underground spiders released thanks to some earthquake action. Along for the ride are: Megan Annabel, Bug Hall, Tiara Ashleigh and Earl Maddox.

Funny to laugh at.....not in the good way either. We also learn the earthquakes releasing the spiders was caused by fracking! You're almost there! It's an exploitation movie that falls far short of exploiting its The action is focused closer to the ground so we don’t really see the scope of the giant spider menace, but it would appear multiple states are in for a lot of problems.

I especially liked that they blamed the quake and the fire breathing spiders on fracking instead of global warming. Both are films about human emotions, dealing with cool themes, and I enjoyed them equally (on different levels of the With an ending that must have looked great on paper but flops due to weak acting and rubbish special effects, Arachnoquake is definitely in the Must Try Harder category. Charlie is in New Orleans when Anabelle arrives, giving the bad news that doesn’t even seem to register to Charlie.

Killer Klowns from Outer Space is awesome, so props for that! Katelynn is also ganked by the spiders, and her daughter Anabelle chases after down the spider hole. From acting to CGI to story it's all extremely bad. Your Ticket Confirmation # is located under the header in your email that reads "Your Ticket Reservation Details". Don't have an account?

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This is a horrible movie but it can be horribly fun if you watch it with friends, and you just make jokes and laugh about how stupid the movie is, which I'm pretty sure is exactly what the intention of the film's producers was.

That is especially true of Edward Furlong who spends his screen time looking stiff and bored, and with his shockingly bloated appearance time has not been kind to him. And though the Queen was trapped, she’s freed due to the underground intruders and is soon chasing them. Rule number one if you're making a horror flick about spiders: they have to look hairy, hideous and menacing. Please enter your email address and we will email you a new password. COMPANY: Active Entertainment RUNTIME: 86 mins FORMAT: Screener PLOT: After earthquakes ravage New O rleans, dozens of locals fall victim to a previously unknown species of deadly albino spiders. All rights reserved.

Main menu. This explains why characters seem to drop into the story with no explanation or background, like when the National Guard just happens to be on the scene of a spider attack... did somebody call them or were they just driving through the area at the time? And what would one of these be without some old TV and movie stars (here we get Tracey Gold from Growing Pains, Ethan Phillips from Benson, and Edward Furlong fitting the bill). A very small budget was applied to this project filmed mostly in Baton Rouge, not New Orleans.

Bless you, SyFy Channel. The film even manages to look cheap, with the editing very hackneyed and the spider effects crude and artificial in look. I only gave it a shot because Edward Furlong was in it, you know, the young dude from Terminator 2 (1991). They also spit fire and walk on water. There's very little to recommend this film; any comedy present is lacklustre, while the predictability is too pronounced.

His father Roy has had it with his idiot son, and Paul’s sister Petra is eager to prove how responsible she is. It's a shame that the director and writer didn't exploit this … TATTOO Needs You to Take a Stab at Supporting Indie Horror! horror, Posted by Tars Tarkas -

"God damnit Jackson this is the best thing I ever heard we should make this into a move." This is a problem because his family runs a tour guide business, and no boat = no tour, thus Paul costs them a lot of money. But then she was dragged to an ambulance. Year released: 2012. It's a lousy and incredibly foolish film without any redeeming values, but at least you'll laugh out loud and forget about your worries for a good hour and a half; - that's also worth something.

In Arachnoquake a freak earth tremor in the New Orleans area releases a race of vicious, albino giant spiders which have been evolving at the centre of the earth for millions of years. How to Get Your Book or Comic Reviewed on HNN. Rotten Tomatoes, home of the Tomatometer, is the most trusted measurement of quality for Movies & TV. All Critics (1)

REVIEW: Written by: Paul A. Birkett & Eric Forsberg Directed by: G.E. We won’t be able to verify your ticket today, but it’s great to know for the future. |. It's his first run of the day & the bus is almost empty but Paul soldiers on like a professional, however they soon notice that all is not right in New Orleans as a new species of Spider seem to infest the city. All rights reserved. "Okay Mark I have a great concept for a movie." The acting, storyline and the 'CGI' was so bad that I actually took the time to register on IMDb to leave a review. But here in Kansas, we also happen to have spiders the size of my thumbnail or even smaller that if they bite you just right can eat away a mound of flesh the size of my fist or even bigger. The Big Easy is attacked by giant spiders.

Coming Soon, Regal Bethany Cox. They must be stopped, before they suck the life out of everyone in the cast... Arachnoquake is set in New Orleans where Roy (Ethan Phillips) runs a sightseeing tour company for tourist's, annoyed at his layabout son Paul (Bug Hall) he decides to demote him to driving tourist's through the city on a bus. Bookmark the permalink. More power to her!!!!! Granted, some are strike outs BUT, I’d say that around 60% of the time, you get it right every time. Please try again later.

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